Oct. 27th, 2004
Just to clarify
Oct. 27th, 2004 12:43 pmmore for me than anything else.
I'm trying to be sensative to my moods, and what causes them. So I can better deal with them.
Today:
- I overslept. This is due to going to bed well after 2, almost 3. I'm not sure how to fix this. Perhaps the all nighter I keep threatening. Bah, should have done that last week, when I had the BatCave opportunity. Maybe next weekend, I can talk CB into a posh party then BatCave then a drive home.
- I got stressed by a client. I feel overwhelmed by them. I should keep notes, or a notebook. or something. That's just getting myself into the habit of doing it. I'm not used to having to answer things right away or being required to remember things short term. I do a job and put it out of my mind. I've done this all my life. Which really made math suck when I'd forget algebra over the summers *grins* I don't think this is something I can change, this way of dealing, so I need more reminders. I also need to ask the client to Set a policy and Stick to it. They only have five people, if everyone is "an exception" then how the hell can I be expected to do a complete job? That's not entirely on me. And I shouldn't treat it as such.
- I am stressed by another client, mostly since I don't want to be here and regress. I don't think I have to fulfill my obligation becuase "i don't want to." and that's a recurring theme that needs working on. Like now, journalling when I should be working. *grins* But I think this is important.
- I have things going on in my life I'm not talking about. Business things, family things, boy things. It's not possible for me to express everything here all at once. I'm on the verge of overwhelmed, and i need to just STOP, Classify, clarify, and deal. Again, using skills I don't usually in my personal life; I need to apply some business things I've learned to my life at home and whatnot. It doesn't help my lack of privacy at home. I believe I can make great headway when Teh Unit is gone next week - look at the room situation - how fast did I get things done when she was gone? I'm hoping this imporves my thought process and lets me get things done.
- My emotions are tangled, and I just want to stop and do nothing but brood. This is very NONCONDUCTIVE to productivity. I'm still working on this, forcing myself to get to work is - painful, but happening. I wish I were in a better place, instead of in brood mode. I'm hoping I can change that tonight one way or another.
- TMI moment - I think I'm midway through my cycle. Hello PMS my old friend. You bitch. That would explain why I feel so emotional about being overwhelmed, especially when business isn't personal. Or being so annoyed about the blurry business/personal line.
Ok, I think that's all for now. I have some stuff to work on and out. But right now I need to get to the receipts, and not work on my interpersonal relationships.
I'm trying to be sensative to my moods, and what causes them. So I can better deal with them.
Today:
- I overslept. This is due to going to bed well after 2, almost 3. I'm not sure how to fix this. Perhaps the all nighter I keep threatening. Bah, should have done that last week, when I had the BatCave opportunity. Maybe next weekend, I can talk CB into a posh party then BatCave then a drive home.
- I got stressed by a client. I feel overwhelmed by them. I should keep notes, or a notebook. or something. That's just getting myself into the habit of doing it. I'm not used to having to answer things right away or being required to remember things short term. I do a job and put it out of my mind. I've done this all my life. Which really made math suck when I'd forget algebra over the summers *grins* I don't think this is something I can change, this way of dealing, so I need more reminders. I also need to ask the client to Set a policy and Stick to it. They only have five people, if everyone is "an exception" then how the hell can I be expected to do a complete job? That's not entirely on me. And I shouldn't treat it as such.
- I am stressed by another client, mostly since I don't want to be here and regress. I don't think I have to fulfill my obligation becuase "i don't want to." and that's a recurring theme that needs working on. Like now, journalling when I should be working. *grins* But I think this is important.
- I have things going on in my life I'm not talking about. Business things, family things, boy things. It's not possible for me to express everything here all at once. I'm on the verge of overwhelmed, and i need to just STOP, Classify, clarify, and deal. Again, using skills I don't usually in my personal life; I need to apply some business things I've learned to my life at home and whatnot. It doesn't help my lack of privacy at home. I believe I can make great headway when Teh Unit is gone next week - look at the room situation - how fast did I get things done when she was gone? I'm hoping this imporves my thought process and lets me get things done.
- My emotions are tangled, and I just want to stop and do nothing but brood. This is very NONCONDUCTIVE to productivity. I'm still working on this, forcing myself to get to work is - painful, but happening. I wish I were in a better place, instead of in brood mode. I'm hoping I can change that tonight one way or another.
- TMI moment - I think I'm midway through my cycle. Hello PMS my old friend. You bitch. That would explain why I feel so emotional about being overwhelmed, especially when business isn't personal. Or being so annoyed about the blurry business/personal line.
Ok, I think that's all for now. I have some stuff to work on and out. But right now I need to get to the receipts, and not work on my interpersonal relationships.
Can I give you an example
Oct. 27th, 2004 05:12 pmof WHY I'm frustrated?
Ok A second example *grins*
I get to my client about 12:30. Find him PISSY, at a project he's doing. He's the guy who has pissed off everyone and has no employees. So he's doing this alone. He's also under a deadline, and being bitchy. S oI get my work done, he asks me to take the deposit to the bank. I also get lunch and call
poetman When I return he asks me to leave for the day. He "can't be interrupted."
Yes, my client sent me home for the day. Ask me WHY I WENT IN AT ALL!?!?!?
First he needs me then he doesn't.
WTF?
So yeah, next Wednesday is going to suck and blow.
I need more clients like Tuesdays, where I just DO MY JOB, and go home.
I'm seriously thinking about retail work for the holidays. Just to get back into the " I need to be at work at foo." attitude back.
*sighs*
I want to work at Torrid tho.......
So I 'm better now, I have a nice long time to get ready, and I'm not at work. AND I get to bill them for 3 hours and the other client 2.
And now Teh Unit is home, and I feel - unable to act. I CAN'T WAIT til she leaves.
She's dropping tidbits on me left and right; probably more later
Ok A second example *grins*
I get to my client about 12:30. Find him PISSY, at a project he's doing. He's the guy who has pissed off everyone and has no employees. So he's doing this alone. He's also under a deadline, and being bitchy. S oI get my work done, he asks me to take the deposit to the bank. I also get lunch and call
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Yes, my client sent me home for the day. Ask me WHY I WENT IN AT ALL!?!?!?
First he needs me then he doesn't.
WTF?
So yeah, next Wednesday is going to suck and blow.
I need more clients like Tuesdays, where I just DO MY JOB, and go home.
I'm seriously thinking about retail work for the holidays. Just to get back into the " I need to be at work at foo." attitude back.
*sighs*
I want to work at Torrid tho.......
So I 'm better now, I have a nice long time to get ready, and I'm not at work. AND I get to bill them for 3 hours and the other client 2.
And now Teh Unit is home, and I feel - unable to act. I CAN'T WAIT til she leaves.
She's dropping tidbits on me left and right; probably more later