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Well, I dunno what's going on.
I had a great night last night, as usual, ManRay was tons of fun. But the end of the night went, shall we say, badly. Funny, how the badness, which wasn't mine, for a change, was linked to one useless person. Which led to a 6AM bedtime (after watching the most DISTURBING version of Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat, I want to be Joan Collins when I grow up, more on that later), which led to a disturbing dream.
I never remember my dreams, which means my rest was fitful, and not really restful.
I dreamed that Netgoth was going to Bermuda. I dunno who exactly, just a bunch of people, although I remember Bunicula and Catling. (I think my mother, her boyfriend, and my nephew were there too.) Everyone was excited and talking, but I was listless, and tired (probably because I really WAS tired and listless) We were in a gate area, waiting for the plane to start loading. It was loud and silly.
The next thing I knew, I was alone, and it was silent. Everyone had left. I got up and went outside (yes I could go outside, don't ask me to explain it) and watched the plane take off. I had fallen asleep and noone had woken me and left me behind (Freud: abandonment issues)
Now in reality this would never have happened. Catling herself would have noticed me sleeping, and where there's a Bunicula there's a Dancer (although I didn't see her) and SHE wouldn't have left me behind. But this is a dream and reality rules don't apply. So I went back inside (which is now crowded as hell) and tried to look for my ticket. I wne through my purse twice, my carry on fell open in the middle of the hallway, and I went through that, and then my purse again and found all sorts of receipts but not my ticket, until the very end (Freud: you have work issues).
So I finally get to the ticket counter and exchange my ticket for a flight the next day. (But I did have a flash forward to having a conversation with Catling and my mom, about how irresponsible I am, and how noone's heard from me for over 80 hours and it was too late to exchange my ticket. Catling - stop laughing at yourself being the voice of reason)
While sitting in the gate area, trying to find my ticket, my friend Lou runs by, playing tag with, of all people, Percy. I stopped and hugged Lou, and asked him where he'd been (Freud: worry about Ranger friend who hasn't been heard from in two weeks) He said "Hey great to see you, sorry I don't have abunch of time you'll be OK if I don't see you, right?" And runs off with Percy again (Freud: Abandonment issues again, plus, personally, I think the crap from earlier in the evening was rolling forward, that someone I care about was throwing me over for someone I don't have around me. Again, in reality, that wouldn't happen, Lou has my back, ALWAYS. No question about that, but apparently there's a doubt. Or maybe Lou was a more convenient symbol that Marcus, whom the problem was really about).
I went home to hang there until my next flight, and somehow watched Lou play some sort of Playstation 2 game, I could see him through his TV. (Freud: Huh? You're a freak lady.) When I talked to him, he said he was busy and he'd call me later, or next time he came home. And he shut the feed off, somehow.
The dream ends with me waiting for the plane the next day alone. I must have fallen deeper asleep.
Seriously, that's fucked up. I'm astonished at the people who were missing. and I don't think I dream about Catling a lot *giggle* I think I have issues with Marcus, and, of all people, Ben Rodda. Lots of story there, not one I'm going into. They were decidedly missing from the dream. Anyone I count on, was missing. La, and Kat, and Dancer and Kazama, and Laura, why in the HELL would I be going to Aruba without her anyway? *sigh*
I think I feel left out, and it's not good. Not something I wanted to be a part of, and watched my friends walk into something nasty. And Marc went willingly.
Ok enough cryptic girl. I need to go and get my alignment for my car.
I had a great night last night, as usual, ManRay was tons of fun. But the end of the night went, shall we say, badly. Funny, how the badness, which wasn't mine, for a change, was linked to one useless person. Which led to a 6AM bedtime (after watching the most DISTURBING version of Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat, I want to be Joan Collins when I grow up, more on that later), which led to a disturbing dream.
I never remember my dreams, which means my rest was fitful, and not really restful.
I dreamed that Netgoth was going to Bermuda. I dunno who exactly, just a bunch of people, although I remember Bunicula and Catling. (I think my mother, her boyfriend, and my nephew were there too.) Everyone was excited and talking, but I was listless, and tired (probably because I really WAS tired and listless) We were in a gate area, waiting for the plane to start loading. It was loud and silly.
The next thing I knew, I was alone, and it was silent. Everyone had left. I got up and went outside (yes I could go outside, don't ask me to explain it) and watched the plane take off. I had fallen asleep and noone had woken me and left me behind (Freud: abandonment issues)
Now in reality this would never have happened. Catling herself would have noticed me sleeping, and where there's a Bunicula there's a Dancer (although I didn't see her) and SHE wouldn't have left me behind. But this is a dream and reality rules don't apply. So I went back inside (which is now crowded as hell) and tried to look for my ticket. I wne through my purse twice, my carry on fell open in the middle of the hallway, and I went through that, and then my purse again and found all sorts of receipts but not my ticket, until the very end (Freud: you have work issues).
So I finally get to the ticket counter and exchange my ticket for a flight the next day. (But I did have a flash forward to having a conversation with Catling and my mom, about how irresponsible I am, and how noone's heard from me for over 80 hours and it was too late to exchange my ticket. Catling - stop laughing at yourself being the voice of reason)
While sitting in the gate area, trying to find my ticket, my friend Lou runs by, playing tag with, of all people, Percy. I stopped and hugged Lou, and asked him where he'd been (Freud: worry about Ranger friend who hasn't been heard from in two weeks) He said "Hey great to see you, sorry I don't have abunch of time you'll be OK if I don't see you, right?" And runs off with Percy again (Freud: Abandonment issues again, plus, personally, I think the crap from earlier in the evening was rolling forward, that someone I care about was throwing me over for someone I don't have around me. Again, in reality, that wouldn't happen, Lou has my back, ALWAYS. No question about that, but apparently there's a doubt. Or maybe Lou was a more convenient symbol that Marcus, whom the problem was really about).
I went home to hang there until my next flight, and somehow watched Lou play some sort of Playstation 2 game, I could see him through his TV. (Freud: Huh? You're a freak lady.) When I talked to him, he said he was busy and he'd call me later, or next time he came home. And he shut the feed off, somehow.
The dream ends with me waiting for the plane the next day alone. I must have fallen deeper asleep.
Seriously, that's fucked up. I'm astonished at the people who were missing. and I don't think I dream about Catling a lot *giggle* I think I have issues with Marcus, and, of all people, Ben Rodda. Lots of story there, not one I'm going into. They were decidedly missing from the dream. Anyone I count on, was missing. La, and Kat, and Dancer and Kazama, and Laura, why in the HELL would I be going to Aruba without her anyway? *sigh*
I think I feel left out, and it's not good. Not something I wanted to be a part of, and watched my friends walk into something nasty. And Marc went willingly.
Ok enough cryptic girl. I need to go and get my alignment for my car.
